Page Four

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Primate Nooz regrets to announce that Mr. Christopher Shaw's on-again off-again lawsuit against us is on again. He has apparently become impatient with the Nooz's inability to keep his name out of the 'Recommended Reading' section, and he feels his reputation is being damaged.  We are deeply saddened, distressed and hurt by this unexpected turn of events, inasmuch as we have tried to accommodate Mr. Shaw in every conceivable way.  Frankly, we believe it's a computer problem, perhaps one of those viruses that's going around, but in any case we have notified our legal advisors, the prominent Cheesequake firm of Thudwick, Thudwick, Marblehead and Thudwick, to anticipate his action, block it if possible, and countersue if necessary.  In the meantime, we are eagerly awaiting his next report from the West Coast.

RECOMMENDED READING:

Langston Abodeely Mulhall  (1947).  The History of Primates from A to Y.   Academic Press, Sydney.  *****

Pudley Abercrombie-Whyte, M.D.  (1976).  Inventions That Have Changed History Series #4: The Motorized Monkey-Snatcher and How It All Began.  Bedlington Press, 732 Sheffield Court SW, Wycombe Common, Alsworthy, Tunbridge Wells, Devonshire, Great Britain. *****

Piet Mons Apeldoorn  (1985).  “Tracking the Deadly Tarsier in the Wilds of Borneo.”  Borneo Bulletin,  61:12-58.  *****

Christopher Shaw  (1989).  “Why I Hate the Reader's Digest.”  Reader's Digest,  901:78-84.  **

 
Nooz Calender
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Surplus sale, Nooz supply room.  Call Quincey Brindle for details on items available.  Sat. Jul. 15, 8-5.

There will be a dinner to raise funds to send the baby bushbaby back to his home in Africa.  If not enough is raised, the Nooz will have to adopt him as our new mascot.  Hellmouth Holiday Inn,  Tue. Jul. 18, 6pm.

Meeting of the Committee To Run The Nooz Out Of Town to be held in the Sigsbee Junior Night College Auditorium. Thur. Jul. 20, 8pm.

Electrician's Emergency Fund charity dance, Antlered Animals Lodge Hall. Sun. Jul. 23,  7:30-???  Don't forget your antlers.

Summer Carnival at the Old Primates Retirement Home. Fri-Sun,  Jul. 29, 30, 31, 10-5.

Annual Hellmouth to Cheesequake Monkey Chase, starting from Joe's Not So Bad Cafe.  Sat. Aug. 5, 11am.   Prizes will be awarded for the first ten monkeys caught.

Tropical Flora and Rainforest Research Center reopens.  Mayor Pruner will officiate and the public is welcome.  Mon. Aug. 14.

Membership drive, Hellmouth chapter of the Malagasy Extinct Lemur Society.  Aug. 21-25.
If not extinct, don't come.

 
 
 Produced as a public service by those friendly
 folks down at the Ralph A. Bennett Teasdale
 Corp., with funding provided by Georgia
 Pacific Gabon, the Matsushita Chopstick Co.,
 Sigsbee Junior Night College Medical Center,
 the Ohio Order of Owl Monkey Observers, the
 Bluetail Foundation, the International Fruit
 Guild, the Malagasy Extinct Lemur Society, the
 Just Say Maybe League, Nick's Cloudseeding
 Service, Cranston's Crematory Supplies,
 Callosities 'n More, Apeldoorn's Oilberry Beer
 Co., the Rice Exchange of Malaysia, the
 Muddy Horntoad Valley Indoor Camping
 Club, the British and Northwest Irish Royal
 Callimiconid Association, the Simian Society
 of New South Wales, the Tropical Flora and
 Rainforest Center, and the 1st National Bank
 of Hellmouth.
 
© M. Charters, 1989, Sierra Madre, CA.
 
ADVERTS

There will be a special tour for primatologists and anyone else to Gabon and Madagascar in December, 1989.  The tour will be led by Eric Scotmeister Fleiglehaus and will be limited to just 12 people.  The group will visit the Makokou Study Area in Gabon, meet with Dr. Oondóué M. Boué, and hopefully observe some bluetail guenons, although there haven't been any there lately, then will fly to Madagascar where they will be personally escorted around the Nosy-Varinda Nature Reserve by Professor Ambato Ambilobe of Antananarivo University.  Nosy-Varinda is known especially for its large endemic population of frilled indris and giant mouse lemurs.  The tour is being jointly sponsored by Gabon Airways and Primate Nooz.  Price including airfare from Los Angeles will be $4,999.99 each or two for $10,599.99.  Call the Nooz for details.

Ultimate Party Line now available.  Strict confidentiality as to species.  Contact Hellmouth Electric Phone.


SPOTLIGHT Cont. from page 3.

skipperjack.  There's a clearing where a tree might have fallen over.  And there's another small hill.  And another clearing.
      So we can see, as the green leaves begin to turn brown under the hot 1250 ° glare of the spotlight, that the apparent uniformity of the rainforest topography is only an illusion, and that the ant-strewn Amazon is really filled with an endlessly fascinating and varied array of physical features.  But the ancient Amazon is much more than this. It is Curuá and Xingu Indians, Iriri and Aporé.  It is jaragua trees and gobo roots and air vines.  It is jumping spider monkeys, white-cheeked muscatels, blueblooded tamarins, gray paladins and Croesus monkeys.  It is leopard birds and green tweeters and a lot of rain.  It is....
      Uh oh, I smell insulation burning, so I better turn the spotlight off now before it swings around and someone gets severely burned.  We'll try to get it fixed for the next issue, but for now, this is Bill Measely.  Ciao.

Page One    Page Two    Page Three    Home Page